Does this look like a kid's story to you?

neuroneptune:

peter-pans-booty-shorts:

ohhowlucky:

danteogodofsoup:

killbenedictcumberbatch:

standupcomedyblog:

John Mulaney | The Salt & Pepper Diner

THE BEST JOKE IN EXISTENCE

GOD I JUST TOLD SOMEONE ABOUT THIS STORY

This is one of the best pieces of comedy that I have ever had the pleasure of witnessing. I love this. I have been looking for this online for awhile.

This is my favorite story ever and I will reblog it every time I see it.

YESSSSSSSS

(Source: timetoputonashow)


always   and   forever   reblog   funny things  

Do you ever feel like a chess piece yourself? In a game being played against your will?

(Source: queensmilitant)


kinklock:

look, I’m just saying, either the fetus is guns and money made to look like a baby bump, or Mary is going to shoot the baby , I don’t make rules ,


good   Mary wank  

turkeyinacan:

diggingaditch:

turkeyinacan:

shoutout to people working weekends and overnights and overtime, people working in hospitality and retail and food service, who are sacrificing time with their loved ones, so fuckers with weekday desk jobs get to live comfortably with the amenities we provide while simultaneously shitting all over us for not getting “real jobs”

This literally does not happen

You literally have no concept of the grown-up world.


Found a photo from my Scotland trip. Can’t wait until I get the chance to come back to this beautiful country.

Found a photo from my Scotland trip. Can’t wait until I get the chance to come back to this beautiful country.


blakanubis:

This is why I send my kids to private wizarding school…


foxmouth:

Karwendel, 2014 | by Daniel Zenker

Didn't Leave Nobody But the Baby
Halia Meguid

haliameguid:

I had a request yesterday to do something in a Southern Gothic vein. This is one of my favorite songs. It’s an old traditional, best known for featuring in the film O Brother, Where Art Thou? It’s creepy, sexy, and a little bit hellish - the best tunes always are. Enjoy. 

DIDN’T LEAVE NOBODY BUT THE BABY (Traditional) 

go to sleep little babe
go to sleep little babe

your momma’s gone away and your daddy’s gonna stay
didn’t leave nobody but the baby

go to sleep little babe
go to sleep little babe

everybody’s gone in the cotton and the corn
didn’t leave nobody but the baby

you’re a sweet little babe
you’re a sweet little babe

honey on the rock and the sugar don’t stop
gonna bring a bottle to the baby

don’t you weep pretty babe
don’t you weep pretty babe

she’s long gone with her red shoes on
gonna need another loving babe

don’t you weep pretty babe
don’t you weep pretty babe

you and me and the devil makes three
don’t need no other lovin’ babe

go to sleep little babe
go to sleep little babe

come lay your bones on the alabaster stones
and be my everlovin’ baby


honeybeys:

Pumpkin carving game strong

honeybeys:

Pumpkin carving game strong


shortstackstyle:

slightly disheveled, but cute. aka me in a nutshell.


{cardigan— forever 21+, button down— victoria’s secret, belt— borrowed from a dress, jeans— forever 21+, watch— jewelmint}


legendarilyinvisible:

does anyone else ever get really stressed over assignments and know that you should be doing them but you feel like you physically can’t stop procrastinating and that just stresses you out even more or is that just me

(Source: jordanwreckes)